Tuesday, September 24, 2013


I've felt lost before. But this is a whole new way. 

I don't feel the inspiration to write or draw, to be creative. I don't have the muse I need to use the beautiful words that make me smile. 

I lie here awake till the early hours wondering what's next. Sometimes Dollydog digs up the pillow next to me and does that dog circle thing they do before they lay down to sleep. That amuses me for a while. 

On a clear night I'll leave the blinds open and watch the stars pass by but that doesn't help. It's taken my a week to get this many sentences written. 

When I started this blog under the name 28 year old single mum, I didnt think it would be read. It was just meant as an outlet for the things I tried to say but couldn't. A coping mechanism for my depression. 2 and a half years later and 34 thousand page views i couldn't be more pleased with the results. 

I've had so much support from people I know and strangers who have stumbled across my rambling. Not only on the serious stuff like depression but on the fun self help guides and my travels in the world of tattooing. 

I want to thank you all for the kind things you have said. You may not know it but they have made a difference. 

And now to my point. I've come to realise I need to write more on here. Because it helps. I am sincerely unhappy right now. Struggling with the introvert who wants to hide away and the extrovert that wants to shout from the rooftops. 

I'm hiding away. My friends will vouch for that. I'm in my room with my books, art and candles. I don't want to come out. Getting out of bed seems more and more futile to me. This phone in my hand is the only real way I am having contact with the outside world. 

I'm fighting back the tears almost constantly and I don't know why.

One thing I do know is I have the bestest friends in the world. I want them to thank them from the bottom of my heart and soul for caring, checking in and having silly pointless conversations that make me laugh so much. 

Look how old my hands look. 

Sunday, August 4, 2013

Never ever in your life mention my daughter again

Being attacked by strange and senseless people on the Internet is not a new thing to me.

I was once threatened by with gang rape by some moron on twitter. I reported this as the user was threatening teenage girls with the same. Twitter did nothing about it. They have a strange view of how people should behave towards others. Free speech and the right to threaten are two different things.

Today someone took to twitter to try and "tell tales" on me. That's fine, the came unstuck when they just tweeted it at me. They tried to use this blog against me, silly person saying I was slating the place I work. So this person reads my blog. It is also clear that this person knows me but chooses to hide behind the Internet rather than talk to me about the issues they clearly have with me.

What angered me so much today was that this cunt of a fucknut chose to use my daughters name to send these tweets. My 9 year old daughter. When I first saw this tweet I was shaking with anger. The content had no effect (thanks teach), say what you want about me. I was mildly peeved this person chose to tweet at my place of work. I was utterly disgusted and appalled that some person who has been in my life, either now or in the past would choose to involve my daughter.

This is the most deplorable behaviour I have ever encountered and I have see people act like utter pricks. Dear readers, friends, you who did this, a line was crossed. I was with the kids dad when this happened. He is not best pleased either. Now I am not going to take the childish root here. I have screen grabs off the tweets send. I have screen grabs of the user name (@mymumisaslag). I have the links to the tweets. The account has now been deleted. But before it was deleted it was reported to the police and twitter.

You must use an email address to set up a twitter account so I am sure soon enough I will find out who did this. It has been added to the previous police report I made as I can only assume that this is the same person. I am not going to threaten violence or be drawn in to an argument. I will do whatever I can to protect my daughter and I will, if I can, press charges.

My last word on the matter: You are a sick twisted individual. They speed at which you chose to delete your account makes me think you realised you made a huge mistake.

Come at me all you want. Never ever in your life mention my daughter again.

Wednesday, July 3, 2013

Get off my land

There is this feeling I have, it’s not fear. But a feeling, about relationships.

 I know entirely that I do not want a relationship (now) with someone that lives in this fair town. I can’t stand the thought of someone just turning up at my door, or demanding my time at short notice. Of course I am all for whimsy. Whimming is how I get through life which explains my ever changing hair colour, which is often done on a whim.

Still, I am so accustomed to my own space that I think I need a whole towns worth of space. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying I want to be all on my own for the rest of my life. I don’t. Just right now I think long distance is for me. Or even medium distance. I don’t have a secret life that I would want to hide from any future significant other. In fact, I am all up for sharing all the skeletons in my closet.

I want to escape this wee-wee soaked heck hole on the weekends. Go on adventures around the country. Yes, I know I can do that with a chap from here. I don’t want to tar all the chaps with the same brush but in general in this town they have big fish syndrome. They think they are big fish, they can go out on a Saturday night and know someone in every pub they go in. But let us not forget this is a small town.

All this thinking and talking with some Sg ladies made me think of Blue Eyes. Not thought of him in a long time. That was long distance. That made me so happy. But looking back now I should have known it would end badly. Everyone said so, I was just too besotted to listen. The things I know now make it so obvious he was sleeping with the woman he left me for when we were still together. That still hurts bit I am no longer bitter about it. I hope he is happy out there doing whatever he does. Our paths will never cross again. And that is for the best.
It seems strange looking back on relationships now. how I behaved in them and towards the people around me. How I have learnt. There is still that one that plagues the back of my mind at night with what ifs. But the sensible me knows there was that one thing that would have ended it all eventually. It's not good that it ended when it did, I was a broken woman. and the way it ended was horrific. But it's done and them 6 months of happiness I wouldn't change for the world.
So here is to the future. I do hope it starts this weekend.

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Advice please

So I have been in my new job a week and a half. Don't get me wrong, I like it, but it doesn't pay a lot. 

I can hear you all now, money doesn't buy you happiness Dougal. Well, yeah it does. Name someone that is happy being skint and I like buying things and going places. 

It's a bit weird being trapped in Swindon. I hate the morning traffic. Not that I have been that trapped. I did escape to Reading and Bristol last weekend.  

The more and more I think about it the more I am drawn to London. Everything I want it there. Lifestyle, career, education, art, culture. But then there is friends, family, the kids school and family.

Here at the west end of the m4 corridor I lead a happy existence, well you know apart from the looming presence of depression.  

I am in a quandary. I want to go. I want to start a new life. But I want to stay here and go annoy Emily at weekends. play I dare you to eat that with Hollie. Wake up on Sams sofa. Drink gin with Nathan and Dougie. 

I'm going to think on it more but I really would appreciate your views lovely readers.  

Friday, June 21, 2013

What rhymes with hug me?

I've put together a short list of things that rhyme with hug me for those of you that were stuck on this one.

Bug Bee - That bug is a bee
Chug Gee - There is Dolly the chug, gee.
Doug Be - Doug be all over the place today, he's crazy.
Drug Free - The correct way if we are talking illegal substances
Dug Oui - Can I get that dug? Oui
Jug Key - The key, for the jug.
Lug Pee - Something no one wants to do.
Mug Pea - The Pea, for the mug.
Plug Lee (in) - To charge him up.
Pug Plea - A plea from all the pugs out there, with their cute little faces.
Rug See - It's a rug, see.
Shrug Spree - What you can't get enough of shrugging.
Slug He - That slug is a male
Smug Sea - No one likes when the sea is smug, with it's waves and it's lapping on the shore.
Snug Ski - This ski fits lovely
Thug She - A female thug
Tug Tee - When your tee is stuck in the grass, tug it.

oh and I want to add this one. Puffy!!

Puffy rhymes with hug me!

As does ritzy.

Thursday, June 13, 2013

8 years on

So after 8 years I am leaving. 

Tomorrow is my last day working with all the guys and girls at the water factory. I can honestly say I'm am tearing up already. 

So much as happened so let's start at the beginning. 

I started as a temp. No plans to make a life out of it. Just needed some money for me, the kid and the kids dad. I was 22 had no tattoos and long brown hair. We were living in a small flat with abis god-dad above a shop. A shop were abis god-mum worked. 

Her god-parents have since got married and started a beautiful little family of their own.  

Since then I have moved in to my own place. The kids dad and I split up. It was a massively hard time for us both. We're friends now, so that's nice.  

I have lost some good friends. I won't dwell on this. We all know. The only thing that made it bearable was standing at the funerals holding hands with you, my friends I met at the water factory.  

There have been marriages and children. New relationships and break ups. And through it all there have been that one constant. People left and new people started. I made the best friends of my life and laughed so much it hurt. 

It's going to be a bittersweet day leaving. It's time for a whole new life for me. I am scared and excited. The only one thing I do know is that I will miss every single one of you. 

So, there are too many to name but all of you who have touched my life over the years the one message I have for you is thank you. 

Here's to you
John, Helen, Boyce, Clare, Sarah, Wendy, Leigh, Nathan, Stacie, Stacey, Chris, Barry, elton, Alice, Gingell, cara, Gary, James, Tina, Hayley, Wayne, Paul, Kevin, Neil, Tracey, reebs, Rory, Naomi, Nathan, Jenna, jody, Kate, Kelly, Kerry, mel, Mandy, Sam, Sara, Liam, Lisa, rob, Nicola, Ben, Martin, Natasha, Shaun, Simon, Stuart, Sophie, Amanda.. 

If I have missed you I am sorry.  

when I first met you

When the bestie and I first met she didn't like me. I was not too fussed on her either.

One drunken conversation in the toilets later followed: "I didn't like you when I first met you, now I do". Years later she is my trusted confidant and maker of yummy dinners.

I have had this conversation quite a few times in my life. Usually followed by uncomfortable hugs on a par with step brothers.

What is it that people see that makes them think I am an immoral bitch, that, if not watched, may potentially kick a kitten?

I am not being all woe is me you misjudged me I'm so sad. I don't give a shit about what opinion you have of me. After all, it's only opinion.

It's seems in the most recent case of this it has come too late. I have let go and I don't think I can face going back on my decision. I appreciate the change of heart but it's too little too late. Here's to the future and all the things that are about to change in such a short space of time.

I think you hate me because you want me
You only want what you can't have
I'm just being who I want to be
But you can't deal with that

You call me a bitch like it's a bad thing
You call me a freak like it means something
Can't get your way so you're so pissed off
I think we know the rest
Get it off your chest
I don't give a shit
I love it when you call me a bitch like it's a bad thing
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Monday, June 10, 2013

Love letters

Well not really. In fact, not at all. Letters from a sociopath / psychopath / someone with some kind of disorder that requires medical attention.

This was posted to the address of my future employees. You can see I added my reply.

I don't know what it's intention was. Maybe to scare me or maybe it's a sick joke. 

It was posted in my home town which makes it a little worse. Some oddball round here has nothing better to do than this. The police were informed and matters are in hand.

I know I am not for everyone:
I am loud. I am disruptive. I would probably say I am obnoxious. I would be the jerk in the band.

If you don't like me, or the way I choose to live my life your best bet would be to avoid me. I really don't have a problem with being cut out. or even not involoved from the outset.

I think I know who sent this, although I currently can't prove it, but one day I will.

All I have left to say on the matter is, if you are reading this, and I believe you are, feel free to carry on your sick campaign. I won't stop doing the things I do. I will continue to be involved with Suicide Girls. I will continue to post the pictures you feel it necessary to report. You can carry on trying to get me banned from facebook and instagram. You can send your passive agressive tweets. I will carry on being friends with the peole you don't want me involved with. You won't get to me. I have no need for you in my life, now, or at any point.

Good luck sicko!

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Dougal versus the moon

Now the moon is not the moon in the sky. Not that big ball that is gravitationally locked with earth (or tidally locked if you prefer).

The moon is the indesit moon. The moon is the name of my washing machine. Also known as the washerchine.

I have come to notice little signs in my life that point towards me struggling with feeling low. Some are glaringly obvious. I cry more. Not in front of you lot. It's not for you. My house which is currently the tidiest it's ever been starts getting messier If you see my without my nails painted then you should be aware things are really bad and I probably need medical help.

So to the moon.

I sometimes struggle with every day chores. Washing up, hoovering, being awake. The biggest of all these foes is doing the washing. 

I don't know how many times I have to re-wash my clothes. I put the machine on. I was my clothes. I leave them. Or I start getting some out and then just stop. Just do something else. 

It's a tiny triumph for me to successfully sort a load of washing on the first attempt. And it will be celebrated. Usually by a lovely nap.  

I just want to point out this is not me being lazy. The depressed mind is a strange place. I want to do stuff. But I just can't. I don't have the energy or the will.  

It's hard to start something if you feel like you failed before you have begun. 

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Live below the line

The Live Below the Line challenge starts in one week, on 29th April.

I will be spending 5 days living below the line and supporting Oxfam while I am doing it.

From the 29th April – 3rd May I can spend no more than £1 a day on food and drink. I am allowed to drink tap water but not eat donated food.

Can you help me raise my small £200 target and donate to Oxfam at www.livebelowtheline.com/me/dougalmct

Saturday, April 13, 2013

For Stacie

One thing I have learnt is don't sweat the small stuff. Shit if I did I would be sobbing continuously.

Another lesson sadly learnt this weekend is don't be quick to trust. It needs to be earned and not given immediately.

I make no bones about the fact I wear my heart on my sleeve. I can't help but tell the truth. And I often put myself out there.

This needs to stop. I need to take a stand back. People on the whole are not what you expect them to be.

Look at me. A lot of you probably think I am the loud mouth tattooed prick. Well yeah I am a bit of a prick. But I am so shy it hurts.

Lets talk about boys again. If there is someone I really like. I can't talk to them. I can't look them in the eye. I can shy away and ultimately make a cock of myself. I would turn in to a teenager, with no clue about the real world. A dribbling, mumbling mess who fails at basic communication.

Ultimately I unload my heart and soul to be quickly rebuffed.

So what do I do? Start so kind of covert operation? Shall I be all aloof and uncaring? It would feel wrong of me to put on a mask and not show the real me. I would rather shout from the roof tops "I think you're awesome and I sometimes pee with the bathroom door open".

I am not sure i can overcome my shyness that makes me so very socially awkward. i do however think I can become that uncaring bitch I am thought to be. Fuck it if you choose to write me off before you know me or not give me a chance that's hardly my problem.

So, no more trusting, not until it's earned.

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Who knew girls could be nice

On first meeting me a boy once asked "are you always this socially awkward?".

The answer is yes. I am socially awkward. It comes from a lifetime of not quite fitting in. Or at least feeling that way. My awkwardness manifests itself in different ways and at different times.

So, there are two types of people I don't get, girls, and boys. I have felt both misogyny and misandry in my life. I have been a feminist and nonchalant to the whole thing but recently I have settled on equality as my choice of stance.

Being friends with girls has always been a struggle for me. Girls are weird things. They come with emotions, tears and massive amounts of bitchiness. This has changed a lot for me recently since I learnt who I can and can't trust. Who will be there for me when I am having my dark times and who will fuck off in to the sunset never to be seen or heard of again.

I have found it so easy to feel comfortable with a new bunch of girls in my life. Alice, Emily, Kate, Kelleh, Milenne, Rachel and Sarah thanks for accepting me and being so nice. I think because I am so much more comfortable with myself and our shared experiences on suicide girls I can open up to them.

Then there's the 5 girls who I would do anything for. Rachel, Sam, Hollie, rhea, Hayley. I cannot wait for us to have the best time ever in Brighton. I promise to keep my clothes on. Well, most of the time anyway.

If these girls rang me at 3 in the morning cos they wanted a redbull I would be there. I am so happy with what has become of our friendships. We have had many rough times along the way. But look at us now. The coolest kids on the planet.

So I guess it turns out that my fear of girls has been unjust.

Girls are bloody awesome.
And my girls are the bestest on the planet.

The bestest.

Monday, March 11, 2013

Everyone is shit

Well not everyone. If you are reading this there is a 50/50 chance you are shit.

A lot of people are turning out to be shit at the moment. Or people I have known to be shit for some time now are proving their shitness by just being more shit.

Below are some examples of shitness. If you recognise these traits in yourself it may well turn out that you are shit.

Talking shit: Now there are 2 categories of talking shit so pay attention.
1 – Lies – Stop telling lies. No one wants to hear your lies. Telling lies is shit. You have 2 ways of getting out of this. Either become brutally honest regardless of feelings or become honest but censor yourself with the age old saying “if you can’t say something nice don’t say anything at all”.
2 – Saying not nice things – Saying not nice things is, well, not nice. Even worse saying these not nice things about your friend increases your shitness exponentially. If you have to say not nice things about your friends you should realise you are in fact, not a good friend and you should do one. To make this simple, friends do and say nice things.

Not turning up – Not turning up makes you shit. Being late I can tolerate as long as the lateness is within 30 minutes of the designated rendezvous time. Anything later than 30 minutes would require you to have a note signed by your mum to explain your social faux-pas. Not turning up at all without a prior warning of non-attendance is shit. Leaving a person hanging with potential attendance is also shit. Make a decision and inform those involved. Stop being shit.

Waking me up – Don’t wake me up, it’s shit of you. Especially don’t wake me up because of alcohol induced rage, tears or horniness. I am tired. I don’t sleep much. And whatever it is that you feel you must tell me about at 3am can probably wait. Exceptions to this rules are as follows: Dead celebrities, snow, we are on weekends away, you are my kid. Other exceptions such as nuclear war and it’s a hot sunny day will be judged on a case by case basis.

Style thief – The style thief is shit. Massively shit. Style is personal and must never be mimicked. Admittedly we are all fashion victims and will pander to the catwalks and high streets. But that is just following the trends. It is what comes after that matters. Don’t tell someone you like their, outfit, shoes etc. and then go and buy the exact same thing. Don’t notice a friends hairstyle or colour and the very next day go and have it done for yourself. And the most important one for me, never, ever, ever, ever get the same tattoo as someone. Copying may be the sincerest form of flattery but it is also a bit creepy and most definitely shit.

Mood swings – Now here I am not talking just general shifts in demeanour. I am talking about those massively unexplainable shifts in attitude that befuddle and piss people off. The best example of this kind of shitness is the one that concerns not getting what you want in the relationship stakes.
I love you
I miss you
I need you
Please give me a chance
Well fuck you then you prick
I still have them naked pics of you and I will post them on the internet.
This is shit. It makes life hard work. Stop being irritating and shit. If you do not get the response you want just move on. No need for this shit aggression.

Being a fucking cheapskate – We are all skint. Which is, in itself, shit. However we all pay our own way. And many of us are happy to help out those that may be skinter than most. However the shitness that we cannot tolerate is the shitness of being unwilling to put your hand in your pocket. If it’s a meal, split it. If it’s your round, buy it. And if you have to pay just that little bit extra because you are slightly better off, don’t be shit, just fucking do it.

Not indicating – This one goes out to all the Costco customers out there, can I get a whoop-whoop. Actually no, don’t bother, I don’t want it. What the fuck is wrong with you cunts? Why the fuck can’t you just stop being shit and indicate. This includes corners and roundabouts.  

I am sure there are other forms of shitness. I shall probably re-visit this in the future, I will see you there.

Saturday, March 9, 2013

Thursday, March 7, 2013

do you have it?

If you’ve got it, flaunt it.

Well what is it? I certainly don’t think I have it. Whatever it may be. And, if you do think you have it, are you not a bit conceited?

My first set went live on Suicide Girls on 19 January. It made me a nervous wreck. What if people don’t like me, what if I look fat, what if you can see my wobbly bits, what if….? I have had a few more shoots since then and the paranoia has not gone. However, I understand completely who I am and what I look like naked now.

It’s an ongoing joke with the Handsome Devils Club that everyone has seen me naked. I am not sure everyone has. A lot of people but not everyone.

I want to tell you what I have learned the past few weeks having had some conversations with lots of Hopefuls like me. We all have insecurities. We worry about how we look. We worry about wobbly bums, fat thighs and saggy stomachs. The only difference is we are comfortable in our own skins.

So here is to the beautiful ladies. The oes who are so really really ridiculously good looking that they look hot in a bin bag:
Fische, Changeling, Marly, Finella, EvaMaria, Kiplin, Chocolat,Elye,Chibbi, Phalaen, Nanci, Reuben_, Miyo

And here is to the girls who have been so funny and friendly these past few weeks, Nanci, Fische, Marly, Kiplin, Finella and Miyo. You girls are amazing and I am honoured to have met you. xx


Thursday, February 21, 2013

Dougal V Splash Media

Splash media are an independent production company that put together such tripe as Desperate Scousewives and Great British Hairdresser (yeah mind-numbing tv. They don't really bring much to the table.

Recently they made a faux-pas. They also back tracked a lot. They asked for tattoo obsessives for a Channel 4 tv show. They reworded their request several times as it turned out they just wanted to make another pile of shit like My Tattoo Addiction.

Below is my reply to them, they got several others like it.

I'm currently working on a new show for Splash Media and C4. We're looking for people with habits that impact their lives and the lives of those closest to them. Habits, habits. I wouldn't call it a habit. Collection maybe. Art enthusiast without a doubt. I have a habit of leaving my dirty washing on the bathroom floor. I don't have a habit of getting tattooed. I invest and research

We're really keen to speak to people with tattoo addiction. Can you not get enough of them? I find it hard to believe that someone could be addicted to tattoos. It is a strange word that Channel 4 seem to want to throw out there and link to tattoos. Correct me if I am wrong guys.

What do your friends/ family think of your passion? What is it that makes you want more Who cares what my friends and family think. It's my body.

Those of us that enter the world of visible tattoos (I am talking proper enthusiast and not those how get their hands and chest done first cos it's "cool") Understand there there always has and always will be a certain amount of stigma around it. That we will have to cover up at (most) places of work. That people with think we are criminals, ne'er-do-wells and in the case of women, sluts. We all make choices in our lives, and not all choices will please everyone. But what a boring place the world would be if we all followed the same path.

Well I have an idea to put to Splash Media. I would like to offer my services to produce this show. Lets get this done right. Lets show amazing artists and real collectors. Not people with unhealthy obsessions with teenage pop stars.

I am willing to put in the leg work for this. Find the artists, set up the interviews, find people with a true passion for an art form that I greatly respect.

So Splash Media it is over to you.

Oh and readers, please email this link to splash@splashmediatv.co.uk or victoriaharris@splashmediatv.co.uk and see if they take me up on the idea.

Update my lovelies - 22 February

Victoria Harris from splash media contacted me to ask for my number which I have given her. No call yet.

How dependent are you..

Recently we did a quiz in Psychologies magazine called How dependent are you on your partner?

Oh what a sad state of affairs. I filled it in about my boss. Luckily enough she is one of my best friends. But, when answering the question 'in an ideal world, how would you spend the day?' All of the answers seemed a little awkward:
1.snuggled up after a romantic walk
2.preparing a day that's tailor-made to please your partner
3.doing something by yourself, but without forgetting your partner.

Well obviously I chose 1, who wouldn't want to spend the day spooning on the sofa with their boss watching Man Vs Food and eating malteasers?

In a real life ideal world (if I ever get a boyfriend) I would choose none of the above. My ideal day will be a warm Saturday. Just pissing about after a long lie in and all the things that entails. It be laughter and fun that is all.

Thursday, February 14, 2013

The number 3

Number 3 was my kitten. She was called number 3 as she one 1 of 5 that were all number and the name stuck.

She sadly got run over and killed last week, I sobbed so bad for her. I miss her so very much.

3 will always be my favourite number after all 3 is the magic number.

Monday, February 11, 2013

Win a tattoo

Win tickets and a tattoo at The Great British Tattoo Show.

Enter now for your chance to win a FREE TATTOO at The Great British Tattoo Show by your choice of working artist.

There are also 10 runner-up prizes of weekend tickets to be won too! So, what are you waiting for people? You have to be in it, to win it!

The winners will be announced on 3rd May 2013

Just click here. It's not spam but it is Facebook.

Adventure time

j'ai vécu un moment de pur bonheur.

Last year I used to go on lots of little adventures. Escape swindon and its nothingness at the weekends. I haven't done it in a long time. My confidence got a kicking and I didn't feel I could.

But I am pleased to announce I am travelling again. Running away to see what I can of the country. I forgot the fun I had. Might not last much longer as I foresee some funding issues.

Still here is to my travels and most of all to Marbella. Cannot wait to hang out with the best peeps in the world in the sun!!

Sunday, February 10, 2013


There has been, for some time in my life, the one I go in circles with. I'm sure you have one too. The one with all the romantic intensions but nothing ever comes of it.

Circle is perfect for me in my head. We laugh, I could open my heart to him, if he wanted it. Maybe he does but it seems the time has passed.

It's a shame really cos it would be easy to be happy.

But I haven't taken the step back after giving the opportunity to make it work.

I am just worried as I can see him about to make the same mistake again. I am not silly. I notice these things.

Sunday, February 3, 2013

You've changed

Sitting round looking at my friends. The new budding relationships and the ones that have been there forever. Our children and their little foibles. It's amazing to me how much we have changed. How we have progressed from the bar to the lounge. Instead of having arguments over games of pool we are having arguments about biscuits.

I cherish each and everyone of you that I am close to right now. We might not want to think it but we've changed.

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

my boyish ugly ass

You can say what you like about me. I am 30 tomorrow I have probably heard it before.

If you do not like the things I put on Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Suicide Girls or Instagram (Dougalmct) then I suggest you do not follow / friend me.

If you are offended by me being naked or swearing or telling the truth about my life do not contact me. If you have nasty comments to make I suggest you fuck off. If you have constructive criticism or even nice things to say I am happy to listen.

The below messages were written by a former friend of mine and her mum after they had blocked and deleted me. I had no chance to defend myself. Or even call them cunts.

My rebuttle:
I will not stop tweeting naked pictures of myself. Don't look if you don't like them.
I may be boyish but that is fine - The girl who said this had the same size breasts as me till she bought new ones
Ugly - Well that is a subjective response.
You called "us" bitches - Yeah we are ha ha ha ha
Cat piss cannot infest something its a liquid. What a poorly thought out sentence.
My home is worth living it, where else would I live.
Sharing my body tits and everything - I would love to show you the pictures I have seen of this girl. It has been agreed that we cannot think of a person inSwindon that hasn't seen her boobs either pre or post op, or both.
Again if you are not interested don't look.
Classy Cunt - Well again the stories I could tell but I won't cos I am not that kind of person.
If you've got it flaunt it - Who decided what it is. It can be whatever you want it to be.

So that is my reply. Hope you enjoy it.

This is why I am so happy to have found Suicide Girls. This is a community of loving people who would never behave like that.

Monday, January 7, 2013

3 days to go

So, I am scared.

It's my 30th birthday on Thursday. I am going to be 30. The big 3-0.

Not sure i am ready for it.

I have finally decided what to do with my life, I am doing my degree finally. I have a beautiful daughter.

I'm just not sure where I thought I would be when I am 30 but this doesn't seem to be it.

This is my lot though so I make the most of it.

So I don't suppose you wanna send me a present but if you do here is my rather lame and boring Wishlist

Saturday, January 5, 2013

Tattooing for Cancer Research UK.

On Saturday 19 Janaury loads of tattoo artists are getting involved to raise money for Cancer Research UK.

I am getting booked in with Shaun Bonanos at Albion Independent in Cheltenham.

100% of the earnings going towards Cancer Research.

Here is the current artist/shop list!

Modern Body Art(Birmingham) Jo Harrison/Matt Hunt/Amy Kinsel/Glenn Patrick/Mark Gray/Ricardo Pedro/Andy Crystalz/Leni Nikijulu/Rachel Baldwin
Guest Artists at MBA: Nick Baldwin (Gung Ho! Mosley)/Jamie Greaves (Real Art, Leicester)/James Kiley (Cult Classic, London)/Gracie Gosling(Signiture studios, Burntwood) Ivana
Painted Lady (Birmingham) Dawnii Fantana/Jonathan Peeler/Claire Goldilox/ Becky Adelaide Lowe
Skinny's Ink (Birmingham) Isobel Juliet Stevenson/Al/Kasi
Off Key Tattoo Studio (Jewellery Quarter, Birmingham) Max Rathbone
The Ink Shack (Solihull) Charlotte Timmons
Last Port Tattoo Parlour (Wolverhampton) Robert W Ashby & Brad Edwards
Age Of Elegance (Wolverhampton) Clint Millard/Sami Adams
Ghost House Collective (Derby) Vicky Morgan/ Justin Burnout/Drew Romero/ Lee Withey/Greg Moore
Mantra (Cheltenham) Darryl Richards/Charlotte Mortell/Scott Owen/Lane Turowski
Albion Independat (Cheltenham) Shaun Bonanos
Infinite Ink (Coventry) Luke Jinks
The Great Western Tattoo Club (Swindon) Sam Ricketts
Bradford Ink (Bradford) Nic/Meg
Jayne Doe (Essex) Nick Whybrow
Bespoke Tattoo (Guildford) Aimée Kinsella
Pheonix Body Art (Shropshire) Claire Brazier
The Ink Surgery (Leicester) James Graham/Rich Mather/Dane Burton
CockaSnook (Newcastle) Kerry-Anne Ricardson/Shaun Bailey/Daniel Hartley/Gregg Scott
Inspirations (Leeds) Mitchell Allenden(Sneaky Mitch)/Rich Wells
Sacred Electric (Leeds) Sway/Sam Layzell
Red Tattoo and Piercing (Leeds) Lucy O'Connell
Rain City (Manchester) Gre Hale/Danny Rossiter/Daniel Morris/Jemma Jones/Matt Cooley
72 Tattoo (Manchester) Sean Lyons/Gavin Rourke/Dan Hancock/Justin Turnbull(jbomb)
Empress Tattoo (Liverpool) David Barry/Charlotte Ross
Institute Tattoo (Norfolk) Phil Denby/Amy Grant
Ink Minx (Scotland) Judi/Jaggy Leigh/Stevo
Sacred Owl (Wales) Shaun Von Sleeze
Synergy Tattoo(Bournemouth) Arienette Ashman
Infamous ink (Stirling) Laura McClintock
72 st Tattoo(Stoke) Matt Webb
Physical Graffiti (Cardiff) Tasha Pollendine
Raw Ink Studio (Coedpoeth, Wales) Craig Hicks

Also...Ian at Real Art (leicester) will be lasering for cancer research on the day!

If there is somebody in particular you would like work from please email them in advance to find out what they plan to do for the event!

Find the event on facebook and get involved.

Thursday, January 3, 2013

When you finally snap

Everyone knows I hate facebook. I'm still on it, I know, but it's nice to be in the loop.

This morning though I finally snapped. I am sick of all the petty tensions and sharing of private information. So here is what happened: