Today I am going to tell you a story of Tinder. "Tinder" I hear you cry. Yes Tinder. I haven't given up on internet dating yet even if it usually flushes out every mental human in a 50 mile radius.
So 2 months ago I matched with a chap. Nothing new there. I match with mutes a lot so day 2 I say hi. We chatted for 12 hours. Pretty much none stop. This is a good sign the average Tinder chat lasts 4 minutes and consists of strangers asking each other how they are.
We spoke every day for 6 days before he gave me his number. This is big news in the world of internet dating.
So we arranged to meet on day 7. On this fateful day I spent the day afternoon at a friends and she poisoned me. Well she didn't, but she did feed me wheat pasta, i spent a lovely evening feeling sorry for myself in the bathroom. That didn't put him off and he still wanted to meet up.
But then he came clean, he was due to leave for America at some point and in his words he 'wouldn't class himself as a keeper but was cool with meeting as friends'.
So after another week of chatting about crisps and gin and adventure time we arranged to meet again. That evening I walked to the pub and crippling social prevented me from going inside. I stood for 10 minutes in the rain in complete panic before going in.
Finally I went in. He was reading (result not a moron) and hand umbrella corps gloves (why do I remember this?). We had a great 3 hours, well I did, and I didn't want it to end but he had to get the last train home. I headed off feeling pleased that I had faced by fears and gone on an actual date with an actual boy. It is not something I had been able to do in ages due to my horrifically low self esteem.
The more we talked and the more I saw him the happier I felt so on day 29 I told him i liked him a lot and I didn't even do a Dumb and Dumber impression when I did it so clearly I meant it (damn it I am such a moron why do i open my big gob?).
So day 48 he tells me he is leaving in 7 days. My heart broke. I knew all along he was leaving. but i didn't think it would be so soon. i didn't think I would just have a week left with this awesome man. So I know what you are thinking "48 days is nothing. It is not long enough to actually care about someone". I do hope you are not thinking that actually you mean bastards.
The thing is I don't find many humans that I get close to either romantically or just as friends. I just am not sure how to do it well, friending (that's a word). So when someone I care about moves to the other side of the world it is a horrible feeling.
Day 56 and he boarded a flight and headed to Orlando to start a new job and, well, a new life.
That was 3 days ago and I feel sad. That is the only way I can describe how I feel just sad.
So that is my story about how internet dating can actually work, even if it is only for 56 days.
I miss him.