Friday, June 15, 2012
When I realised I didn't care
I would honestly say that the last 6 or 7 months have been, to use a massive cliche, an emotional rollercoaster, ending in being dumped in a rather mean way. Yes I got dumped by text (again).
I was utterly distraught by this, but, I had a odd epiphany. That is to say I had an intuitive grasp of reality I didn't observe a church festival in commemoration of the coming of the Magi. I realised that I just don't care anymore. I just don't give a fuck.
That is not to say I am not still very much in love with the Dumper, cos I am. I miss him loads. But as the dumpee I am powerless in this situation. And hey I seem to have gained a quite awesome friend who says nice things. Not exactly what I was looking for but better than nothing I suppose.
This not giving a fuck feeling is great. In the classy establishment that is the co-op a lovely middle aged lady said "tut why she got to have all them tattoos?" her friend replied "I dunno but I bet she don't have a job" The best part of this was when I turned round, she works for the same company I do. There is a lesson here about taking your work ID off when not at work. These are the utter dick heads I have to deal with on a daily basis. I am not gonna change them and making a scene in the co-op, although enjoyable, is not going to achieve anything. I just can't wait to be in my local office so I can walk past this delightful ladies desk. I shall stop and say hello to her.
I think I have had all the emotions now. There are none left. My one remaining feeling was hurt and that's it. I am officially dead inside. Which nicely brings me back to zombies.