Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Sickness and the single mum

I think the big-mouth-on-the-Internet lady met her match this week and it's name is germs.

I NEED TO GET BETTER THIS IS HARD WORK.

Had a lovely Monday at work followed by a lovely evening with HD and the kid. Went to bed as normal. Woke up at 4am on the Tuesday feeling like death had come for me and not quite finished the job. I have now been in bed for 48 hours with occasional trips to the bathroom to vomit and break the toilet seat. And I did manage to sit on the sofa for a bit.

My glands are swollen so much I cannot move my neck and standing up causes the worlds worst headache to become a sharp pain like someone has stabbed me in the skull. This then caused me to be very dizzy and ultimately be sick. Oh and then there is moving. I feel like my body has been hit in every single area with a baseball bat. Even my little toes ache. If you want to come round and see me phone ahead so I have an hour or so to get to the door.

Herein lies the problem. Not the sickness, everyone gets sick, that's life. But, trying to cope with the sickness and the kid, on my own.

During day 1 of the sickness the kid was well behaved and awfully helpful bringing me drinks and getting my bag which contains all the tablets I need to keep me going; anti-depressants, beta blockers, pain killers.

The kid made her own lunch, a chicken roll, and lucky enough we were sent a feast of a delivery by a super awesome person that the kid went to the door to collect and chowed down on.

Day 2 started well but the kid grew impatient and bored. I couldn't entertain her as i can bearly lift my head . Except for the occasional sneeze where I bite my tongue I have nothing.

Luckily her dad was kind enough to pick her up for a few hours.

Them few hours left me time to think. It's times like these that I wish I had someone around to help out. They don't need to be immediately around. Not even in the same town. But just someone I can cry on when I feel this bad. I can honestly say this is the sickest i have ever felt. And I can also say I honestly felt like I needed someone around to help.

I know my friends would be here in a second. SD was super enough to offer her assistance. But what I really need is a hug. And that's not the same from a friend. And SD and I have a strictly no hugging rule. (love you bestie)

I haven't felt like i needed help in a long time. It's not a nice feeling to me. It left me wanting to climb back in my shell and hide even more.

I'm hoping to wake up feeling amazing and cured tomorrow. The fact is though it's nearly midnight. I can't sleep. I feel like I am dying. My alarm goes off at 6am. I can't see day 3 being much better.

Oh and I left my painkillers in the front room so I just had some calpol. It was the nearest thing.

Reasons to get better:
1. Guns and Roses tribute band Friday night
2. Hen do in Windsor Saturday nigh
3. Miss q10 immensely
4. Silverstone grand prix at the pig on Sunday

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