Is PDA A-OK?
The public display of affection (PDA), is it ok?
This last weekend my friends and I bore witness to a PDA. Well I say a PDA. The whole evening was an elaborate ruse. We were just to pawns in a game of "I am gonna bone this girl". This PDA was more scent marking the area. He might as well had pissed on her right there at the bar.
The married among us were shocked that people act like this beyond the age of 15. The single among us were scared that this is now how we need to act to find a significant other. All of us were feeling a little bit queasy at the sight.
Beyond hand holding (whilst walking only) and the occasionally peck on the lips / cheek when sharing a bit of an 'in' joke, PDAs are not ok.
I do not need to see you and your most recent catch, or even your long term lover, basically dry humping. Especially so when we are only out and not out-out.
Showing posts with label boundaries. Show all posts
Showing posts with label boundaries. Show all posts
Monday, November 26, 2012
Friday, August 24, 2012
A guide to moving on
So, you've been dumped, well kinda, but not quite...
We've all done it. And don't even try to deny it. We have all clung on like a baby monkey to the end of a relationship with an utter douche.
We want so desperately to keep hold of them and for things to be like they were at the start when it was all goo-goo eyes and snuggles after sweaty sex. We somehow think that maintaining the sweaty sex will lead to the snuggles. In today’s guide I will tell you how to stop spending time with that fuckhole or being a fuckhole.
1. The easiest and most important step, turn your phone off on Friday and Saturday evenings. - Them lovely, chatty, texts messages that arrive at any time after 9pm on the evenings will only lead to one thing. Sex, that you both like to pretend is meaningless, it’s not. I was once told that sex is never meaningless. I believe this to be wholeheartedly true. Don't get in to the situation where the meaning is different for the both of you.
2. If you are out on a Friday and Saturday evening, turn your phone off - To initiate the chatty messages only gives the impression that you are happy with the other persons meaning of sex. Remember you are the baby monkey here. You are the one hanging on to the relationship. They other person is only looking for a place to get their rocks off. You are an easy target.
3. Get off Facebook - I have said it before and I will say it again FaceyB is a no good place. Your sad and lonely status updates will make you look weak and therefore easy prey. Either delete the moron off of your friend list. Or the preferable option delete your FaceyB account. If you do choose to delete your account don't make a big scene about because I assure you, no one cares. Don't go putting a status about how you are going to delete your account. If you choose to delete the person you are clinging to do not put a status either before or after about having a 'clearout'. Remember baby monkey now is not the time to draw attention to how desperate you are. Keep quiet and be low key.
4. Stay in public at all times - You know that one or both of you will want to talk, you know, about 'us'. These talks must take place in a public arena, Go to the pub or Starbucks or Nandos. That way you avoid crying because of the fear of public ridicule and you are less likely to end up having the sex, especially if you take separate cars. Not environmentally friendly but it does help avoid you getting Chlamydia. Don't be fooled baby monkey, the one you are hanging on to with sleeping with other people. You are the backup plan as these other people are not yet quite as hooked as you are.
5. Just stop fucking doing it - Baby monkey you know the other one is a douche. You know in turn you are being a douche by hanging on and hoping. Just stop it; stop having sex and answering texts. Move on with your life. You don't need to be with someone else, just be. Hang out with your friends, or make new friends. Take up a new hobby, I suggest being my cleaner. No good will come of this situation, you know it in your heart. You friends and maybe family have told you, you should listen to them.
Go forth and be free, I promise you you’ll find serendipity.
We've all done it. And don't even try to deny it. We have all clung on like a baby monkey to the end of a relationship with an utter douche.
We want so desperately to keep hold of them and for things to be like they were at the start when it was all goo-goo eyes and snuggles after sweaty sex. We somehow think that maintaining the sweaty sex will lead to the snuggles. In today’s guide I will tell you how to stop spending time with that fuckhole or being a fuckhole.
1. The easiest and most important step, turn your phone off on Friday and Saturday evenings. - Them lovely, chatty, texts messages that arrive at any time after 9pm on the evenings will only lead to one thing. Sex, that you both like to pretend is meaningless, it’s not. I was once told that sex is never meaningless. I believe this to be wholeheartedly true. Don't get in to the situation where the meaning is different for the both of you.
2. If you are out on a Friday and Saturday evening, turn your phone off - To initiate the chatty messages only gives the impression that you are happy with the other persons meaning of sex. Remember you are the baby monkey here. You are the one hanging on to the relationship. They other person is only looking for a place to get their rocks off. You are an easy target.
3. Get off Facebook - I have said it before and I will say it again FaceyB is a no good place. Your sad and lonely status updates will make you look weak and therefore easy prey. Either delete the moron off of your friend list. Or the preferable option delete your FaceyB account. If you do choose to delete your account don't make a big scene about because I assure you, no one cares. Don't go putting a status about how you are going to delete your account. If you choose to delete the person you are clinging to do not put a status either before or after about having a 'clearout'. Remember baby monkey now is not the time to draw attention to how desperate you are. Keep quiet and be low key.
4. Stay in public at all times - You know that one or both of you will want to talk, you know, about 'us'. These talks must take place in a public arena, Go to the pub or Starbucks or Nandos. That way you avoid crying because of the fear of public ridicule and you are less likely to end up having the sex, especially if you take separate cars. Not environmentally friendly but it does help avoid you getting Chlamydia. Don't be fooled baby monkey, the one you are hanging on to with sleeping with other people. You are the backup plan as these other people are not yet quite as hooked as you are.
5. Just stop fucking doing it - Baby monkey you know the other one is a douche. You know in turn you are being a douche by hanging on and hoping. Just stop it; stop having sex and answering texts. Move on with your life. You don't need to be with someone else, just be. Hang out with your friends, or make new friends. Take up a new hobby, I suggest being my cleaner. No good will come of this situation, you know it in your heart. You friends and maybe family have told you, you should listen to them.
Go forth and be free, I promise you you’ll find serendipity.
Sunday, March 4, 2012
Your hair looks stupid
This weekend a woman come up to me. Stood around 10 inches away from me. Stared for an uncomfortably long amount of time. Then said "you have a lot of tattoos" I said "yes" she then went on to say "I don't like them". I looked at her and said "oh".
I am very rarely without a come back. But I just didn't know what to say.
I spoke with a friend about it today. She has given me some awesome ideas of what to say in future. My friend made an awesome point though. What if I had gone up to this woman who I had never seen in my life before and said "I don't like your hair"? She, and hopefully most of you, would think that I was a rude bitch.
It's funny how tattoos can make people so vocal and intrusive. They feel they can share opinions on subject matter and meanings of tattoos like their word is gospel.
It's strange to me having only recently entered to world of having visible tattoos. I have been called a stupid girl at a train station, been grabbed by a check out girl at asda half an hour after having my arm finished (ow) and had my top pulled up so high so someone could see my back that the vast amount of people in the pub I was in saw my very pretty bra.
It's like being pregnant, everyone touches your stomach and tells you what you're having and the weight. And I hated that. So do not think that I am going to be happy if you place your hands or your shit opinions anywhere near me. I've got photos I will show you them. Just don't touch me.
Ex oh ex oh
I am very rarely without a come back. But I just didn't know what to say.
I spoke with a friend about it today. She has given me some awesome ideas of what to say in future. My friend made an awesome point though. What if I had gone up to this woman who I had never seen in my life before and said "I don't like your hair"? She, and hopefully most of you, would think that I was a rude bitch.
It's funny how tattoos can make people so vocal and intrusive. They feel they can share opinions on subject matter and meanings of tattoos like their word is gospel.
It's strange to me having only recently entered to world of having visible tattoos. I have been called a stupid girl at a train station, been grabbed by a check out girl at asda half an hour after having my arm finished (ow) and had my top pulled up so high so someone could see my back that the vast amount of people in the pub I was in saw my very pretty bra.
It's like being pregnant, everyone touches your stomach and tells you what you're having and the weight. And I hated that. So do not think that I am going to be happy if you place your hands or your shit opinions anywhere near me. I've got photos I will show you them. Just don't touch me.
Ex oh ex oh
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