I don't need feminism

Nothing makes me sadder than when I hear a girl or woman say "I don't need feminism".

• Two women a week are murdered by a partner or ex-partner in the UK
• In India schoolgirls are beaten for resisting boys' sexual advances
• I know of schools in the UK that police the length of girls skirt because a short skirt is inappropriate or distracts boys
• Women worldwide ages 15-44 are more likely to die or be maimed because of male violence than because of cancer, malaria, war and traffic accidents combined

I am willing to bet €7 if you hate femisimn or feminists your probably don't understand what it is.

Every man, woman and child needs feminism because feminism is not about hating men it is about advocating, personal, financial, social and political equality.

This is just a quick note and I am nnot going to rant but just a final thought.. Did you know Google searches for "International Men's Day" spike on "International Women's Day". And I don't think it is from people who genuinely want to be involved in International men's day. It's from people shouting what about international men's day.

Well just so you know. International Men's day has been on 19 November since 1992.

In 2018 the theme is Positive Male Role Models.

Surviving a long distance relationship

 

When you think of a long distance relationship you think of 2 people that were together but have become separated by work or, for the younger generation, education.
 

Well I have done it another way. My last and current relationship started out from the beginning as long distance. My ill-fated relationship with blue eyes was about 100 miles apart and that was when he was not working all round the country. My current relationship is 80 miles apart.
 

Now dont get me wrong I have no bitter feelings about blue eyes. I did, but I got bored of it. The hurt feelings fade away. We occasionally speak about pointless things. I will always make time for him if he needed it. However, the way in which things ended really has made me feel very uncertain about myself and my new beau. I don't want to measure my relationships in miles but in shared dreams. Of course, physical separation results in increased anxiety. This is not unhappiness. It is nice to have someone in  my life to miss again. Just sometimes when you get home from a shitty day at work or spending 4 hours trapped on the m4 you want a hug not a text.
 

Instead of writing a self help on this I thought I would share the help from that bible of womanhood that is Cosmopolitan. From 'looking after yourself' to phone sex and talking dirty, Cosmo’s got it covered…
 

1.Communicate on a daily basis (or whenever suits you best as a couple) and arrange specific times to stick to, like a date.

Thanks for stating the obvious cosmo. Who would have thought to speak to the person you are in a relationship with at a convienient time.

2.Distance may be preventing you from getting down and dirty but there’s no point in letting him forget just how sexy you are, is there? Sexting, phone sex and virtual loving are all available at your fingertips
Is sexting a made up word? I think it is. And the saying virtual loving just makes me want to be sick in my mouth. Why does cosmo still have the view that sex is meant to be getting down and dirty? I thought cosmo was open minded and for modern women? I don't know any woman that would use this kind of language.

3.Learn to speak the (dirty) language of love, sure to keep him hanging on to your every word. Never done it before? It’s simple! Say what you feel and if you need inspiration try reading erotic fiction to get your creative juices flowing.
Again cosmo refer to sex as dirty. I think someone needs to re-write the tone of voice guidelines they use. Yeah I got all professional on you there. Don't be scared.
What cosmo is suggesting here is quoting 50 shades of grey, unleashing your inner goddess. Oh my!!
 

4.Nothing captures a moment better then a song. Make a deal to create each other a compilation CD of all the songs you love at the moment and hits that remind you of him.
Are you saying make a mix tape? I think you are. I have come to believe that whoever wrote this had a hangover one Sunday and were sat around in their PJs watching Friends on comedy central.
 

5.Ever thought of writing a lust letter? Unlike a text a letter can really let you get imaginative. You can get personal, detail your fantasies or favourite sexual moments you’ve had. Finish with a spray of your best perfume and pop in the post. The perfect erotic keepsake!
I think what cosmo are saying here is that technology prevents you being creative. To put these words down on paper would really make me cringe. If you really must do this try email. If it is poorly recieved you can claim your email has been hacked. And spraying it with perfume seems a juvenile act and reeks of desperation in many ways.
 

6.There will be tough times when all you want is to see him. For moments like this just remind yourself of all the happy moments you’ve had together. Have a look at some old snaps or give him a text, it’s likely he’s feeling the same. Need a hug? Pop on one of his jumpers, it's the next best thing.
There will be tough times, this is correct. Remember the happy times, yes its going well so far. Pictures, ok. Send a text, yeah good idea. Oh no you ruined it. A jumper is not the next best thing to physical contact and interaction. So near, yet so far.
 

7.There’s nothing like a sex game to spice things up and just because there’s miles between doesn’t mean you can’t play along. Try a picture phone game. Send him snaps of certain body parts (make them sexy yet difficult to identify) for every part he guesses correctly, credit him with another minute of his favourite foreplay movement for next time you get together.
Hang on isn't this the age old game of ass or elbow? Credit him with another minute of foreplay. That is right penis is one hand and stop watch in the other. You don't wanna run over, he hasn't earned it. Are we now training to be a mistress?
 

8.Unfortunately, as much as we love our boyfriends they can do things that drive us CRAZY. LDRs can dilute the fact he likes to chew with his mouth open or that he spends hours on his games console, all the little things that would probably cause a massive argument if you had to deal with them continuously. These problems will seem pretty much irrelevant when you do get to spend time together.
This isn't advice it is a statement. This must have been the moment when the writers obligatory hangover dominoes arrived.
 

9.Try throwing yourself into a positive activity. Try hard at work and reap in the benefits both career and money wise, meet up with lots of friends, get a new hobby, the list is endless! That way you won’t be sitting around pining but will be making the most of your life.
So, the advice here is when not with boyfriend do something different. Brilliant. I wish I had thought of this. I had been sat here in the dark waiting for his next visit.
 

10.Ok time to be selfish ladies and talk the big O. The biggest cause of annoyance at LDRs can be the sheer sexual frustration of it all, so why not invest in some toys? Sure to keep you satisfied until the next visit plus we’re sure he wouldn’t object to listening in.
Oh the big O, snigger snigger, I think you mean orgasm, giggle. Come on cosmo write it like this "why not have a lady wank?". Oh and let him listen in, you have cheated here you have gone back to point 2.

Well I do hope all that insight helped. Oh and follow me on twitter @dougalsuicide it'll be fucking algerbraic I promise.

Real women?

I'm making a stand, not just for the slimmer girl, but I am hoping to make a stand for all the shapes of ladies and possibly men too.

I don't know where I was recently. I forgot like I forget most things however what I do remember is some woman ranting on about 'real women'.

• What I learned is: 
• Real women have curves
• Real women have boobs
• men like a bit of something to grab on to
• Real women are size 12
• Some other bull shit.

These real women sound fascinating. Lets face it, all women have some kind of hang up on their bodies and it turns out men do too but don't really go on about it as much. The size or shape of a body does not make a woman more or less fictional. You don't have to make excuses for being a larger lady than me. This real woman thing does not interest me in the slightest. If I were to listen to all this bullshit I would be unreal but, not like, in a gnarly way:

• I don't have curves
• I don't have boobs
• why are they hanging on? is this cliffhanger (classically shite film)
• I'm not size 12
• blah blah blah

I guess we all have views of our ideal when it comes to women but the word  real does not really fit in. How about ladies, we all stop talking shit out how one another looks and maybe do as the great philosopher HD says and get naked.

Some suicide lovelies

If you were to ask me what my ideal was, how I would want to look, it would be tattooed and comfortable in who I am.

I am tattooed, yes, but am I comfortable, no. I am more so these days. I spent a lot of my life being hung up on the fact that I am flat chested and I hate my legs. I bloody hate them. But they are mine. My bodily hang ups haven't really ever stopped me doing anything in life, nor should they.

It has been a long time since I have looked at another woman and thought "I want to look like her" cos, well, I look like me and what is the point wishing for things I really can't have. I would prefer to spend my time dreaming of the things I already have that make me happy. i guess I do spend a lot of time trawling beautiful images of tattoos wanting them, but they are attainable, so that's OK.

I am not trying to preach to you ladies, I know my words are not going to change your thinking. I know you are going to be holding them few inches on you belly and feeling unhappy with it. Or doing the lady down bounce to get your jeans on cos you really are still size 8. I think my point is, stop wanting the bodies of other women and stop thinking not nice thoughts of that lady that walked past, you can't be her.

Keep it foolish. Check out the website, yeah? It’s well fuckin’ futile.

Feminism in my house

I came across this:
http://www.rockalily.com/blog/feminism-why-i-am-giving-up-high-heels.html
An awesome site and blog for all you rockabilly ladies out there. Here @ReeReeRockette states her case for giving up heels. I understand her cause but alas I cannot join. I love my heels. I spend too much money on them and have a corner in my room dedicated to my favourites.

Now @ReeReeRockette tweeted me saying: @kirstytelling he he! I didn't want to start a crusade ;-) Feminism promotes choice! Rock your heels! x

I promised her that this Saturday I would rock my converse and dedicate it to her.

This got me thinking. Where do I stand on stuff like this. I know I am not feminine, I swear like a sailor, burp like a real man, spend my weekends with football and f1 and will see any tree as a climbing challenge. I also don't know where feminists would stand on my dress sense. I have already mentioned the too short skirts.

For the past few years it has just been me and the little lady at home. Don't get me wrong her dad has her 50% of the time I'm not about to rant about him.

I try to set a positive example for the kid. We have sat down and talked in depth about how I work full-time as I want to pay my own way. I know it upsets her that we don't get a lot I time together. She tells me she wants me to be like the other mums that pick their kids up from school everyday. I hope that one day she appreciates what I do, not so we can live the high life, but so we are comfortable and don't have to worry about paying the gas bill.

We have also spoke about boyfriends. I'm not a man hater. I'm not really a woman hater either. I spend time with them in equal measures. Both sexes can be absolute bitches and both sexes can offer a shoulder to cry on. There is not a quality I prefer in either sex. Well apart from the penis, a good quality penis.
So where does that leave me?
I'm not sure. I know I am not an active feminist. But I understand and take to heart the worldwide issue of women's rights.
I hope I am setting a good example to the little lady. How to be a modern woman and work hard to get what you want. I also want her to, well I guess respect men. To find a man in your life for friendship or a relationship that fits you, your personality and lifestyle can be the best feeling in the world. But it can be the same with a woman I guess.

I am unsure and I guess time will tell as the little kid gets into a big kid.

Keep rocking awesome shoes of any heel height and check out http://www.rockalily.com