Sunday, March 25, 2012

Sun, sex and tattooed folk

I am just trying to lure you in with talk of sex. Of course I shall say inappropriate things, probably a bit too loudly in a pub near you, but I shall not ever tell you my dirty little secrets. Kiss and tell is not good form.

This Saturday we officially decided summer had started as a douche was spotted in lydiard park with his top off. It's not top off weather. It's no jumper weather. Maybe a cardigan for the late afternoon. It's not summer yet people it goes down to 2 degrees at night. Put some clothes on.

The weather however has been awesome for this time of year. Awesome that is in terms of warm days. Not awesome in terms of rainfall. We are officially in drought. Research it and find out the ways you can save water. This is an issue that is very close to my heart. I cannot stand people who do not turn off the tap when they brush their teeth. That may sound like I am making a joke but I am not. I cannot deal with it. It makes me so angry. Just turn the darn tap off.

So, yeah, my point was the sun is here. This means not only is my bag full with make up which needs to be reapplied hourly due to unnaturally watery eyes, but I will be carrying factor 50 everywhere with me. Probably Johnson baby factor 50, I like the way it smells. It's not like I don't like the sun. I do. I bloody love bein all warm and cosy. Especially with very little clothes on. I don't like sunburn.

I saw vast numbers of sunburnt people this weekend. Not only do I not want to risk skin cancer and looking old and wrinkly I specifically do not want to fade my tattoos. Sorry for getting all Baz Luhrmann on you there. If you really must be tanned get a spray tan. I can't bloody stand spray, mousse or any other kind of fake tan but if you really must do it then let me come watch so I can look at you naked.

I spent my weekend with some unexpected ladies. Although they are super friends we have not really spent this much time with each other in a long time. It was really good to talk and learn that the things I write and say are helping people understand their own issues or the issues of others.

Keep your questions and comments coming in. You'll get nothing but the truth back from me.

Kisses, but only on the cheek in a continental fashion.

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